Fort Collins (Colorado, USA) | Regrouping - 22 Feb, 2023

When most people think of buses in Mexico, I believe they have visions of buses like these with chickens tied to the rooftops. Nothing could be further from the truth. Although I took this picture in San José del Cabo, my buses were very modern and rivaled some of the nicest buses I have experienced in Europe. I included this photo here as it ties nicely with my post today. 

I will take a bit of risk here, take a different approach with this post, and attempt to share what I am feeling and experiencing since returning from Baja. I have taken few pictures in the last several days. In fact, I have not been out much. To be candid, it feels strange being in Colorado at the moment. My lifestyle here is so different than how I live when I am traveling. There are obvious things, like the weather and the clothes I wear. Gone are warm mid-70s F (low 20s C). The temperature has plummeted to a high of 3 F (-16 C). The last few days have culminated in a Winter Storm Warning, which is dropping about 6 inches (~15 cm) of snow today. Plus, there are the less obvious things, such as changes to my daily routine, activity level, and independence. Because I am more accessible, I feel like there is considerably more noise in my routine in the States. More demands on my time. 

The western part of the United States is spread out, and public transportation is not readily accessible here. For example, the nearest grocery store is > 3 km (1.8 mi), and the nearest retail stores are 13 km (8 mi) roundtrip. This may not sound very far, but when you are on foot like I am these days, it limits my accessibility to resources. I've walked many kilometers (miles) and know it takes me 2.5 hrs to walk those distances. Combine that with the drastic change in weather, and you now understand why I have not been doing much lately. The good news is that this allows me more time to reflect on my travels while reading my blog. 

I feel as though I am Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea these days. I am caught between the life I once lived and the life that is seeking me. Not fully inhabiting either at the moment. I learned last summer that being prepared for every type of adventure results in me carrying around things I don't need most of the time. When I returned in December, I told myself I would match my gear to my purpose and return more frequently if needed. The desire to stick with this approach evades me now that I am back. I know that when I am in the States, I no longer live the life that seeks me. 

There is a quote that resonates with me loudly at the moment. I have shared it with many people I have crossed paths with. The life that is seeking you cannot find you if you are unwilling to let go of the life you have. Is it time to finally let go completely?

I am halfway through my posts and my journey while on the Camino de Santiago at this point. Not only am I finding the breadcrumbs I left for myself during the journey, but I am also uncovering some other patterns about myself. This is normal anytime a person allows themselves the space for deep introspection. For me, the key is to become curious about myself and the patterns that emerge. Why is this pattern emerging? What events in my past have contributed to this? Why has the pattern not emerged before? 

I have also been reorganizing and planning when I haven't been reading and reflecting. This includes replacing my gear. I noticed the other day I have already worn out the trail runners I bought in Gijón, Spain. I have already put well over 600 km (372 mi) on that pair. Consequently, I ordered another pair. These served me well and will be needed when I resume traveling shortly. 

While in Mexico, I traveled with a small roller suitcase to see how I would like it instead of a backpack. After a month of totting a suitcase around Mexico, I have decided that a backpack suits my needs better. It affords me flexibility in mobility that I do not have with a suitcase. I am currently trying to find a suitable pack for my travels. I have visited several stores and ordered a few backpacks. All have disappointed me thus far. Why not use the rucksack I had previously? The simple answer is my backpack is too big and too heavy. I want to find a smaller pack and save close to 2 lbs (1 kg). I want to reduce the size of my pack from 60 liters to around 40 liters. 

And my planning? I mentioned in December I wanted to explore southeast Asia and Japan. The one major hurdle to me doing so is the cost of flights. Japan was one of the last countries to open up after Covid. They reopened international travel in October of 2022.

Consequently, airline fares are high at the moment as the airlines try to recoup lost revenue from overly anxious travelers. Fares are expected to drop later in 2023. So, I plan to table this. So where am I heading? I am working on that piece and will have more information in the next post.